Jenny's Story
Jenny's story is a fabulous example of how knowing her values has taken her on a journey to self-discovery and supported her through some very tough times. I'll let her tell you more.
Francine Kaye
"Life coaching has, for some time, been something I have wanted to undertake, however, had never quite got around to it. During the latter part of 2003, parts of my life seemed to be getting out of control; my personal life and my work life seemed to be overlapping too much, I was suffering from what I thought was a lack of confidence with work and now, looking back, my health had seriously started to suffer.
Personal problems over the 2003 Christmas period helped me to make the final decision to contact a life coach, knowing that a new year was on the way and that change was definitely needed. After reviewing Fiona Harrold's website, I found Francine's name amongst the coaches.
I liked the way Francine had coached other clients and this encouraged me to e-mail her with the issues I was facing at the time.
The Meaning of Values
I started the coaching in early January 2004 and from the first telephone call with Francine, I started to understand the true meaning of Values. I realised from that first conversation how much I had been compromising my own values in order to please other people and started to understand why I had felt so edgy and irritated from time to time!
I was amazed how much clearer things seemed from just opening my eyes to that fact! Francine challenged me with various questions about my life, but I never felt out of control with this, in fact I felt free and could be honest with myself for the first time in so long; the truth seemed to come so easily.
With Francine's help, I came to understand what my core values really are; those of freedom, integrity and most of all respect. I realised that I am a special person and have special talents to give the world; they had just been hidden away, probably since I was a child. Little did I realise how those core values and the coaching would help me in the months to follow.
Difficult Times
In February this year, I came down with a chest infection, which wiped me out for a week and suffered with post viral fatigue following that. I continued the coaching with Francine and that gave me the strength each week to face whatever I was dealing with at the time.
During March, I contracted shingles, which unfortunately did knock me sideways and put me out of action for another three weeks. I still continued with the coaching when I could, and noticed that although I was physically weak, mentally I had become very strong.
It was after this bout of shingles that the most amazing thing happened. For the first time since I was a very small child, I saw the world in a completely different light.
I started to realise what was really important to me in life. I was really enjoying peace and my own company, living in the "now" rather than looking to the past or future with worries and concerns - little did I realise that this would be for a reason, I had no idea what was around the corner waiting for me!
I tried to go back to work part-time at the end of March. I could not believe how slow I felt going back in there. Everyone else seemed to be working at such a high pace and I just felt I couldn't keep up, which was a shock to me bearing in mind colleagues had told me that I always seemed to work at 100 miles per hour and give 150% to everything I have done, never satisfied with the 100%.
My body obviously realised that something wasn't right, as I noticed my leg muscles and occasionally my arm muscles were aching a lot. The walk from the car park into the office seemed to take an eternity; I was incredibly tearful and exhausted.
Talking to people in the office became a chore, as I was feeling giddy and faint, needing to sit down, as standing up was a hardship. I managed to get to the Thursday of that week and had to face facts, I was still not well.
Time passed after this week at work, and still I did not feel any better; all sorts of dreadful ideas were going through my mind about what was wrong with me, yet knowing my true self as I did now, helped me to keep focus and I decided following numerous visits to my doctor to see a specialist in Infectious Diseases; he then hit me with the bombshell - that I had M.E. (myalgic encephalomyelitis).
This was on 13 May 2004 and my life has not been the same since.
However, thanks to the coaching with Francine and gaining an understanding of who I truly am, I know that I can deal with whatever life throws at me.
M.E. is part of my journey through life and, although it is and has been very difficult and painful, I know that whatever I have to deal with on a particular day, whether it be severe myalgia in my muscles through doing to much, non-stop tears during a low "depression" day or one of the other numerous symptoms, I will always find my way back to me because of what I know now.
Stop "doing" and Start "being"
I read an article last week by another M.E. sufferer who wrote that with this illness you have to learn to stop "doing" and start simply "being"; for a perfectionist workaholic, that is a heck of a lot to deal with, however, I know if I don't start following that advice, I won't recover!
This sounds like a cliché, however, as the true me; I feel that M.E. has saved my life. Something had to change, given the pace with which I was living my life both personally and professionally and this illness has given me the chance to review where I am today and decide which corner I turn tomorrow.
I know that I have to wait until my body is ready for M.E. to leave, so until then I am trying to enjoy every day, never knowing what events will occur after I open my tired eyes each morning.
I know that my life is for living, with or without this illness, so thanks Francine for helping me to truly open my eyes to what is out there for me and to stop worrying about all those tomorrows!"
Jenny
