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Dreading Christmas with my family
Answer by Mike Blissett
Katja asks:
I'm going to be spending Christmas with my family and although they areall kind and loving people I always dread it.
Quite a few bad things have happened to my family around this time of year and it always seems to bring the bad memories back, my parents and grandma end up drinking far too much and becoming weepy and sentimental - my sister can escape to her own family but I am stuck there - it just makes me want to curl up and hide.
Help! How do I cope with this without hurting my family or having a miserable time myself?
Mike says:
I really do understand where you're coming from, Christmas can be such a highly pressured experience. I ask myself, why do we place such high importance on everything going smoothly and perfectly at this time? Is it just all the Christmas movies we've all seen? Possibly.
Truth is we place such a high level of pressure on our selves we basically set ourselves up to lose. Not the best option, I'm sure you'll agree.
Rather than feeling a victim, letting whatever happens happen, why not take control? If you chose to be with your family, then decide beforehand to be positive, proactive, and happy. This can be as simple as not judging someone, steering the conversation to a positive place, keeping the whole atmosphere 'light' (no heavy movies, go for a silly old board game - it is Christmas after all).
The bottom line is to give yourself, and Christmas a break. Don't get too heavy about it. Whatever is passed is just that, passed. Onwards; Christmas 2003 will be fun.
Believe it, plan it, don't fear it - and remember to leave a mince pie out for Santa!
All the very best & tell me how you got on.
This is question 30 of 41
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