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Is Coaching Right For You?
I've been a professional Coach for over 6 years, and my experience tells me that coaching is not for everyone
Some people are just not ready to take the necessary actions, which will take their lives forward. They need to spend more time reflecting and examining their feelings and their underlying roots. Other people need to spend more time telling their "story" and are just not prepared to let it go just yet and move on with their lives.
That's absolutely fine.
When You're Ready
We can only get to where we want to be when we are ready and everyone will take their own amount of time to do this. I had a client who was 74 and came to me because she wanted to be a better mother! It takes as long as it takes to be ready. The point is that it's really important for anyone considering coaching to be really clear about how the coaching partnership works and how the process differs from counselling or therapy.
Reflection Or Action?
Whilst counselling and therapy are based on reflection and the examination of feelings and their underlying causes, Coaching is action based, using the past for information but not dwelling there for too long.
The main reason is that we don't live in the past, we live in the present and the choices we make today must be based on who we are now rather than whom we have been. Coaching makes this clear distinction so that you can make choices today that will give a great future tomorrow.
So Who Is Coaching For?
Well, people from all walks of life come to coaching for many reasons and the main reason is change. If you are ready, willing and able to do what needs to be done to have your life the way you want it to be, then Coaching is the perfect partnership for you.
Coaching is about you deliberately designing your life how you want it to be and then partnering with a coach to take consistent actions to make that happen. Whether it's business or personal, coaching is a partnership dedicated to your choosing a life where you’re doing what you love and realising the results you want.
Able
I spoke about ready, willing and able. The "able" part is about your mental state.
Coaching is for well, healthy individuals. What does that mean? The National Health Service has a great term for the majority of human beings in the 21st Century. We are not ill or debilitated in any way, but they call us "the worried well."
We are often overwhelmed with the pace of our lives, juggling career and relationships, building successful businesses, working towards some kind of financial independence, coping with divorce or relationship breakdown, yearning for our soul mate in life or just longing for some time to think through the next chapter of our lives.
We are busier than we have ever been and investing some of that time in partnering with a coach helps us to make sense of it all and become focused and clear about what needs to happen in order for us to get from where we are now to where we want to be and who we need to be in order to get there.
No Drama!
If what you want to do is hold on to the drama of your life and imagine that your coach will sympathise with you, then you may be surprised to hear that your coach will hold a much higher bar for you than perhaps you even hold for yourself right now.
Coaches know that human beings love drama. That's why Eastenders and Coronation Street are so popular! It's always about what he said, what she didn't say and what they are doing to them. The distinction here is that that's TV and this is your life we are talking about.
No Collusion
A coach will not collude with the drama of your life. A coach will help you to discover the enormous benefits in taking a hundred per cent responsibility for your own life by taking control of it rather than giving your power away to others.
The business of coaching is one that is based on a true empathy for what it is to be a human being with all its struggles, but it doesn't sympathise with any behaviour that keeps a drama activated.
Coaching is a two-way partnership and a great coach creates the space for the client to grow by offering strategies and skills and new perspectives that will open up possibilities to the client. The client is asked to take these new possibilities for their lives on board, be willing to try them on and begin applying them in their lives.
If you are not ready to do this then you are simply not ready for coaching. A coach can help you "buy your ticket" for the next part of your journey, but its up to you to take the "train" that will take you there.
Transformation
Partnering with a coach can be a life transforming experience. Thousands and thousands of people lives all over the world have been turned around as a result of great coaching. If you are thinking of working with a coach, we have a fabulous way of helping you find the right coach for you.
Firstly contact the coach of your choice, either by e-mail or phone. Find out how they might benefit you, how they work and what investment you would be making.
If you have done this via e-mail, and had a chance to digest the information sent to you, then make sure you set up a call with your prospective coach so that you can both experience each other, which will allow you to intuitively decide if the coach is right for you and vice-versa. Be sure you understand their contract and what is expected of you and ask as many questions as you want to so you can make an informed choice.
Commitment
Once you have decided on the best coach for you, get committed to having the most powerful few months of your life. Come to your calls on time, mentally ready to work on your life and in particular on what it is that you want to achieve.
This is a partnership and both coach and client take full responsibility for the coaching relationship. If you are uncomfortable with any aspect of the coaching, it is up to you to say so. It works both ways. Sometimes your coach will be very honest with you about what they observe the thing to know is that it will be in service of you being your best self at all times.
Both Client and Coach take full responsibility for the quality of the coaching partnership. When you keep your appointment with your coach you are showing yourself how important you are. We often put other people first, but this is your time and your coach is ready and waiting specifically to give you that time.
The time you spend with your coach is as vital to you health, wealth and fulfilment as absolutely anything else that is happening that day.
So now you know, if you were teetering on the edge, exactly what coaching is all about. If you are ready, willing and able to do what it takes to have your life work in any area where you are currently not receiving the results you’d like, then coaching is exactly the partnership you are looking for and we look forward to the honour of working with you.
