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Five Steps To Rediscover The Real You
1. Identify your "essence"
Ask yourself this simple, defining question: "if I were locked up in a prison for a long time what would I continue to do, what would I definitely not stop doing?" Your impulsive answer will give you a really good indication of what’s truly important to you, and what you should be doing more of in your life.
Perhaps you said singing, or writing, or exercising... if so, these form the fundamental part of the authentic you. If this exercise gives you your answer, you should make this new it centre stage in your life. If you do, you’ll feel more real, more true to whom you are. It may be something specific like singing, writing or keeping fit or something less obvious such as inspiring and motivating others.
This is what is absolutely vital to you to have in your life. It’s part and parcel of who you are. It’s your very essence. A meaningful life for you depends on you expressing these intrinsic impulses.
2. Picture yourself
Go back through the family photo albums and find a photograph of yourself aged 11 or 12 doing something active, having fun. This is an age when your original spirit will be evident. If circumstances dampened or curbed your spirit at that time, go back to the age when your spirit was entirely fresh and unaffected, perhaps when you were 4 or 5. Look hard at that photo. Your spirit should be shining out. What words and values does that photograph evoke?
Look again at that photo and remind yourself, "that is me." Not "that was me" but "that IS me."
Your spirit may be hidden now, but it is still there.
Now how are you going to free yourself, to liberate your spirit and be who you really are? Don’t forget, once you’re over 21, no one can clobber your spirit – only you, or allow others to. So dig it out, dust it down and set it free. Give it a bigger place in your life.
3. Be your own counsel
Vow to be more self -reliant. One sure way of losing sight of what you think and who you are is to ask lots of other people. You end up with a hotch-potch of views, and your wisdom will be no better than the received wisdom of others.
Vow to stop asking for advice. And before you ask anyone for their OPINION, ask yourself first. Trust your instincts. They’re better than you think and the more you use them, the sharper they’ll get.
4. Forget about money
Imagine you’ve won the lottery and you never have to do another day’s work in your life. After the Bond Street shopping spree and the Caribbean holiday, what else would you do? Lounging by your pool would soon become boring (yes, really!).
What would you do if you didn’t have to do anything? However idealistic your answers, take note. You’re getting a glimpse of your ideal life here. Hold on to the images and resolve to bring some of them to life, either as part of your working life or outside of work. Getting paid for your contribution is undeniably handy, but the vital thing is to bring these changes into your life.
5. Do it!
Become a doer, not a talker. There are two types of people, the ones who do, and the ones who do when they’ve finished what they’re doing. If you’ve come this far, and you’ve uncovered a secret passion/skill/gift/urge that had been dormant for decades it would be an absolute travesty not to act on it!
Decide on one action that you can take today to get you on the road to reveal more of the undercover you. As George Eliot said over150 years ago, "it is never too late to be what you might have been." Come on – do it!
