Apr 10
Self-reliance vs Dependence
Leafing through the papers over lunch yesterday I read that David Cameron wants to give power back to the people. He wants to ‘end this culture of entitlement and build a new culture of responsibility.’ Great idea.
Then I turned the page and read, ‘We want a bigger house so we can have seven more kids.’ Pregnant mum-of-seven Claire Davey has never had a full-time job but insists there’s nothing wrong with the taxpayer picking up the tab for her enormous brood – and vows to have another seven children.
Mr Davey, 35, gave up his post in administration nine years ago after realising they would be better off living off the state.
I’m not going to rant about this – but it does make me wonder!
It makes me wonder – how does a government foster self-reliance? How can it promote personal responsibility? And is it made more difficult when it pays people not to work, when it takes responsibility for your survival and wellbeing?
What does cradle-to-grave paternalism do to the psyche?
The Scottish reformer and writer, Samuel Smiles, asked a similar question in 1859. This is what he said,
‘No laws, however stringent, can make the idle industrious, the thriftless provident, or the drunken sober. Such reforms can only be effected by means of individual action, economy and self-denial; by better habits, rather than by greater rights’.
In Victorian homes, his book, Self-Help, was second in status only to the Bible. Smiles was in his earlier life a rabid political reformer, but gave this up when he realised the more pressing type of reform was personal.
Coming from a background of political activism in Northern Ireland and then in London in the eighties, I’ve made a similar journey. OK, I admit I stood for parliament at the last election – but there was no-one else to fly the Green flag – I had to!
What do you think ? How do you foster self-reliance and personal power within yourself? How do you foster it in others?
Excellent post, gets to the heart of the problem of the culture of entitlement. Effort, enterprise, & hardwork need to be rewarded by recognition, encouragement & financial incentivises. Disincentivise the culture of entitlement & free up everyones initiative.
Thanks Melanie,
a comment at last! I think EVERYONE must agree or we’d have had more comments!
All the best,
Fiona
It is a great idea, although like a lot of statements from politicians I struggle to see a clear link to the “how”.
In many ways this is such an endemic problem…get this right and the results really could be transformational!
Some observations.
1. Should this be approached top down or bottom up?
i.e. (s)
i)When you see bankers making decisions based on greed that have catastrophic ramifications for everyone, yet they feel entitled to bonuses & our government do not block this.
ii) Our celebrity culture of people being famous & wealthy for no apparent reason
iii) The Olympic committee going massively over budget & expecting more funds to be poured in.
Where is the true accountability or consequence? What kind of example does this set?
2. We should not just consider the current generation, but also the example we set our children
3. To enable this to work, it may actually be sensible to start with a more direct/autocratic approach.
A very thought provoking post!
It pays to start from the bottom up, Jason – with you – you, you, you, waiting and wanting for no one but you to make the first move, and keep on making your move.
There is more than one side to this problem.People who drop out need vocational help,motivational training and a guarantee that if they have a failed attempt at getting back to work that they will get the same benefits restored.
As it is the system punishes them for trying to get back to work by making it impossible for them to get the same benefits again if the return-to-work does’nt go well for some reason.
Also,there does need to be jobs to go to,I would love to see some types of regulation swept away to create new jobs.Enterprise and endeavour need the right environment to flourish and the size of the black market economy in Britain is a reflection of the difficulty people have in running businesses and staying within the rules.
Philip,
don’t you also think self-reliance also means more of us creating our own means of support rather than waiting to be given a job – putting ourselves to work rather than waiting and hoping – for someone else to hand us what we want.
The answer to your question is “no”.
Dont get me wrong,almost all of my working life I have been 100% independant,I live on the extreme edge of self-reliance (and most of it abroad in “poor” countries with no welfare state).First of all lets say a Mum returning to work in Britain or a long-term unemployed person decided to knock on all the doors around where they live and offer to clean something or make something or fix something or run an errand.The first thing that would happen is that they would be arrested.This is one thing I meant by de-regulating everything,to allow enterprise and initiative to flourish,but expecting people to be self-reliant when the world in which they live (Great Britian) is entirely based on the mis-guided socialist system is cruel.If you want people to be more self relaint first of all you must make society more structured to that end,it is unfair and wrong to raise people in a socialist-model state and then tell them to be self-reliant,change the state first!Also,it is wrong again to expect everyone to be an entrepreneur or self-employed,what is right, is to encourage and assist those who are able to create wealth and create jobs instead of penalising them (the socialist way)We are not all cut out to be on the front line of creativity,a physicist for example who spends 10 hours a day doing research is no less self-reliant than I am,its just that I happen to rely on my raw ability to make money and make things happen,but someone who relies on an infinite ocean of patience or obsession with detail is just as self-reliant as I am.So to get back to your question,20% of adults in Britain dont work because this is how they have been conditioned by society,and rather than “blame” or “label” people who live on welfare or punish them in some way,we need to look at role of the state has played in Britain especially since the end of the last world war,re-structure society,re-educate the people and get Britain back to work.
Well, Philip, my job is to empower individuals to feel confident and motivated to take 100% responsibility for making their life work. It seems to work for the people who write to me after reading my books or those making use of the support and encouragement available through the community here.
I do agree,you do a great job,and I love your books,and we all need to look in the mirror and take responsibility,absolutely,the only point I was making that the specific problem of so many people in Britain living off the welfare state cannot be solved by individuals adopting more self-reliance alone.
As I said I love your work,but,a nation is not a mass of individuals,it is a collective society,in order for an individual to function well and make use of their talents,then there needs to be a structured environment in order for them to flourish.
The role of government should not be to dis-empower people or make them state-dependant(which is pretty much the labour view)but neither should the government just sit back and let things happen(which is really what the conservatives do)Have a nice weekend !
The only time people will come off and stay off welfare is when they feel able to – and we should all do what we can to help people feel smart enough and resourceful enough to market their unique talents to the workplace and marketplace.
Amen!
Yes,I am sure that lady in the story could easily run a nursery,she must love kids ! Her husband could do the admin-sorted.Go and see them !
She has absolutely no need/incentive to change a single thing, with benefits of £42,000 a year.
Hi Fiona
I had an email from you this morning and I looked at the blog from a link.
I’m sorry to say, that whilst I have always found you very supportive and inspirational, this post has disappointed me.
You have come across as cold, uncaring, intolerant and really very niaive.
I’m guessing from the article you’ve quoted, you’ve been reading the Daily Mail. Your choice, but please don’t believe all you read. They are renowned for getting their facts wrong and telling complete lies. I would want to see evidence of these benefits before I am convinced. Papers deal in spin and they all have distinct political biases – we shouldn’t forget this.
I also feel the fact that no-one posted a response does not mean everyone agrees. There could be many who disagree but don’t want to argue the point. Along with a whole load of people who just don’t read the blog. Plus others who don’t feel this should turn into a political soap-box. And if this is what I’m going to see, I’m not sure I will read in the future.
Your way is not the right way for everyone. Some people need a bit of space, nurture, understanding to make the best of themselves.
I realise you have frustrated political ambitions. But I feel you should not let this overlap with your professional practice. Keep the politics out. The politicians do this as their job and to be frank, they’re talking the country into such gloom.
And if you believe that just cutting off benefits will result in a complete reawakening for people, you need to read a few history books. I predict a period of grave civil unrest and increased crime which will affect us all.
Hi Jacquie,
the feature on the mother of seven (with another on the way) who had never worked and never intended to work was from ‘Closer’ magazine and then reported across most of the other daily papers.
This isn’t about politics. It’s about our culture and a culture that engenders helplessness and a lack of personal responsibility.
I have never said we should cut people’s benefits. I simply think our current system encourages apathy and resignation and a healthy debate on the subject may not be a bad thing – especially as I contribute to it through my taxes.
Many thanks for your comments.
ps. If I had serious political ambitions, I wouldn’t be in the Green Party – but would have stuck with the Labour Party!
Hi Fiona
You did say the woman did not need to change a thing with £42,000 of benefits coming in. The logical conclusion I drew from that statement was that incentive needed to be withdrawn
If George Osborne is to be believed you will have your chance to influence the politicians. But, I’d be surprised if that was anything more than a PR exercise involving listening, so ostensibly making people feel good and then hoping they’ll go away.
Politicians know the reality of these soundings is everyone fights their own corner, votes for the services they use and argue the rest is waste. But, it gives them an opportunity to say there was wide consultation when imposing the cuts and a get out clause when everything goes wrong. That is abdicating their personal responsibility as the government of the nation.
Politicians are responsible for shaping public policy which underpins out culture. So, for example in giving a tax break for marriage on the basis that it keeps families together and is good for children, the government is formulating a policy which says married life is better than single life and that single parents are worth less than married parents.
I do agree with you that dependency is bad. But people need to
learn this at the earliest possible opportunity. At school, children need to be taught to make the best use of their many varied abilities, and not feel they are being programmed to become other people’s wage slaves.
They need to feel they have genuine options which lead them to start businesses, or gravitate towards jobs that are right for them. They need to feel success early on. Government policy can steer that by relaxing the rigid curriculum. If we had genuine free schools like one I was reading about called, I think, Summershill, which wasn’t that great in the curriculum aspects of Ofsted but was outstanding in promoting responsibility, caring, decency, self esteem, independence, I think we could crack the culture problems.
Now, you are the ideal woman for ‘Self esteem tsar’. Women like the one we’ve been discussing often see having children as the only thing they’ve ever been successful at. Higher self esteem will produce higher success stories.
Now we’ve had our debate, use your public profile to influence the big boys.
Very happy to help, Jacquie – send George and Dave to me anytime!
And, don’t forget our weekly Coaching Hour, Thursday at 8, motivates people from all over the UK – and beyond – absolutely free.
http://www.fionaharrold.com/conversation/index.php?board=41.0
We all have our part to play in uplifting GB.
All the best,
Fiona
Wow you guys – you are missing the point Fiona is making. We are all individually responsible for our own wellbeing. How is it we got addicted to being looked after by others? It is not up to ’society’ or ‘governments’ or ‘a husband’ or ‘a wife’ to look after our needs. Talk about pass the buck! The only person that can make you happy, is you. Only you know what that magical mix is – or do you? I see so many people completely lost, not knowing who they are, what they want, because ’society’ and consumerism has bombarded them with messages and advertising that says do this, get that, follow me ( I know best what’s right for you – this will make you happy! ). I switched off my TV and stopped reading media publications 18 months ago.Best thing I ever did. Are you aware of how much the media keeps us dis-satisfied with our lives?? Distracted from the wonderful life pulsing all around us?Please,take time to question what you are told, what you listen to. Too often we follow others, and not lead our own lives.
It’s that simple, Vicky! It’s that simple.
And I thought you wouldn’t see this comment because it was an old post!! Yes, it really is that simple, but not to those lost in the media bombardment of messages everyday. I was thinking about it abit more yesterday …. how did we get to be such sheep, following more than leading. Fear of change, choas, .. the usual thoughts occurred… then I realised something else that I think is quite significant. I have 2 teenage daughters who are struggling at the moment to ‘fit in’. No matter how much I tell them to consult themselves first, they still hesitate to do what they want. Then the penny dropped. Look at this …. as a child we follow our parents direction and instruction, and once we go to school…again we follow other people’s instruction… and it becomes a habit …one we are uncomfortable about breaking!!! No wonder teens struggle,it is a literal change they have to make, from dependent following, to independent leading.( Your self-reliance vs Dependence Fiona)If they can’t accomplish this here, it gets carried through to adulthood. Even though I have taught my girls to think independently all their lives, they still hesitate to do what they want. A helpful insight,for me, so I hope sharing it helps someone else….
Vicky,
come and join us on the latest blog – Spot Your Talent!
xx
Have your say!
Add your comment below - Be nice. Keep it clean. Stay on topic. No spam.
FionaHarrold.com is gravatar enabled. To get your own globally recognized avatar, sign up at Gravatar.
Recent Posts
Archives
Fiona Harrold Consultancy, BM Box 789, London, WC1N 3XX.
About | Contact | Help | Media | Privacy | Security