Purpose, Passion & Destiny
Module 4: Craft Your Ideal Life

Welcome to Module 4

In this module, you’re going to get clear about what truly matters to you. Building on all the good work you’ve done so far, you’re going to understand your purpose and define the unique mission of your life. Then you’re going to understand your core values, your personal standards in life. And finally, you’ll create a precise vision of your ideal life – of the way you want to live, the people you want around you, the work you want to do, the type of lifestyle you enjoy.

Wow. Let’s get started.

Part One

Live life with purpose

What did you come into the world to be and do? How can you be of service? What’s the bigger picture of your life? Having a sense of purpose gives you a wellspring of energy. It forms a defining framework for everything you do. It provides meaning and direction for how you live. It motivates and inspires you. When you are living with purpose, it naturally heightens your sense of passion, and propels your destiny.

Answer these four questions, with a few words or a short statement for each:

  1. What do you want most out of life?
  2. What do you want to see happen in the world?
  3. What makes you special?
  4. What can you do / are you capable of doing right now?

Now write out your statement as follows:
‘I will… (choose an answer from 4), using my… (answer from 3), to accomplish… (answer from 2), and in so doing achieve…(answer from 1).’

For example, Helen, one of my clients, answered:

1. happiness 2. understanding and tolerance 3. my energy, positiveness, my ability to inspire; my ability to connect – to feel the mood, to be sensitive to the feelings around me and always see the other side 4. I can bring people together

Here’s how Helen wrote her statement:

‘I will bring people together using my ability to inspire and connect to accomplish understanding and tolerance and in so doing achieve happiness.’

As you read your purpose statement, think about the part about what you want to see happen in the world.
Once you have your purpose statement, start to infuse your life with it. Translate it into every aspect of your life. Make it make a difference right now. The scope for manifesting your purpose will be forever evolving. Simply start from where you are.

Part Two

Clarify your core values

Do you have a well thought-out value system? Your values define what’s important to you and underpin every decision you make and every action you take. They are your personal standards in life: your code of ethics. They are your template for a life of authenticity and personal integrity. They’re not prompted by how you think you should be, or how you think you need to be to impress others. Your values are qualities that make you feel good in yourself, ‘on the inside’ – and that you admire in others. These are the qualities you are naturally pulled towards.

Answer this question:

What are your top ten personal standards?

Henry Ford, the inventor of the modern motor car, said, ‘Quality means doing it right when no one is looking.’ What’s important to you to do right when no one is looking?

Answer the following questions:

Think about an occasion when you felt ‘really you’, when you felt fully and powerfully yourself. When you felt genuine, natural and authentic. Describe how you were at this time. The qualities and characteristics you uncover are very likely to be important values for you.

Now think about an occasion when you felt you were prevented from being your ‘real’ self. Describe how you were at this time. The likelihood is that you were repressing values that were important to you.

Think about how you spend your money, and in particular the possession you have that is most important to you. What does this mean to you, and what does it give you?

For example,

An occasion when Joanna felt ‘really her’ was when she was travelling. She loved the fact she could please herself, live from day to day, and learn about different cultures. She also loved the spectacular sites she saw, especially wonderful sunsets and mountain views. From this experience, Joanna was able to identify some of her key values: independence, freedom, spontaneity, learning and beauty.

An occasion when she felt prevented from being her ‘real’ self was when she had been working in an office where everyone was judged by individual targets, and where competition rather than teamwork was admired. From this experience, she was able to identify that co-operation, sharing, teamwork, and helping others were key values. She also uncovered the values of honesty and respect.

One of the things Joanna loved to spend her money on was small, thoughtful, surprise gifts for her partner, uncovering for her the values of love, sharing, caring and intimacy.  She also saved each month, as she didn’t want to be depended on anyone, demonstrating again the importance of independence to her, and also security. Her most valued possession was her car, a Mini Cooper, and underneath was the sheer feeling of fun she had every time she drove that car.

What about you – what are your core values?

Study the words that emerge. Absorb them. Write them on a piece of paper that you take out and look at every day. These words define you. They cut to the very core of who you are and what living your destiny with purpose and passion is all about. How you express them may change, but your core values will remain the same. Commit now to living them fully. 

Part Three

Envision your ideal life

Purpose and values are keystones to an ideal life. What else? What does your ideal life look like? In order to create what you want, start by creating a vision of it first. Everything we have in our lives starts this way.

Think BIG. Stretch your horizons. One of the fastest ways to kill passion is to play your life too small; to limit yourself by what you feel is ‘realistic’. As the poet Samuel Johnson said, ‘Our aspirations are our possibilities’. Play bigger than ‘reality’.

Think that bit bigger. Widen your horizons. Envision a life that really works for you, one that makes you genuinely happy and fulfilled. Imagine a life where you express your unique individuality: think beyond what others want and aspire to; this is about what really matters to you, uniquely you.  How would that life be? How would you live, what people would be around you, what work would you do, what lifestyle would you enjoy?

Answer the following questions:

When my life is ideal I am…
How I want to live is…
The people I want around me are…
The work I want to do is…
How I want to relax and have fun is…

Consider every area of your life. Your relationships, your work, your social life, your family, friends, community, your personal and spiritual development, your home… what else? 

For example:

…I have a gorgeous home. One that is warm and welcoming, where friends love to come and stay and which is full of laughter and love. I have a beautiful garden that is an oasis for wildlife and where chickens and dogs play happily side-by-side…

Express that vision is a tangible way. Write out your thoughts, paint a picture, create a collage, design a mood board – whatever is right for you.  Feel what it would be like to live that life. Feel it so much it’s as though you’re already there. Own it.

Take two further steps

Step 1: Clear out the clutter

Answer this question:

What do I need to stop tolerating in my life?

Think about what needs to change. What are you currently tolerating in your life that is allowing your life to fall short of your ideal? What’s in your life at the moment that is draining your passion and enthusiasm? Focus on every aspect of your life, and write the results down. These are the things you want to move out of your life. They have no place. They don’t belong.

Imagine what it will be like if these things weren’t in your life any more.

Answer this question:

How will I move these things out of my life?

Declutter your life; from now on work to get rid of anything that doesn’t fit, until what remains is what really works for you, a life that makes you genuinely happy and fulfilled. It’s time to spring clean and make all the rooms in your life fresh and clean and shining. This is about reclaiming your life, and putting the pieces of your life back together again in a way that positively builds your ideal life.
 
Step 2: Get more of what you love

Think about what’s already working in your life. Recognise where your life is already in harmony with your ideal.

Answer this question:

What do I like about my life, as it is, right now?

Again, think about every aspect of your life, and write these things down. They demonstrate that you’re already living part of your ideal life. Give yourself some time to enjoy thinking about these golden nuggets. They are to appreciate, to keep, and nurture.

Answer this question:

How will I make sure I appreciate and nurture the golden nuggets in my life?

Prominent psychologists consistently report the importance of appreciation to successfully living a happy and fulfilled life. Make sure you give yourself time to focus on what you already have in your life to be grateful for. Enjoy being happy with what you already have in your life and be eager for more!

Action!

Actions of the Week

1. Define your purpose, a personal declaration that inspires and energises you

Infuse your life with it; translate this sense of purpose into every aspect of your life.

 
2. From your global dreams, identify any personal work that you need to do

As you do the personal work, your purpose will clarify, strengthen and refine.

3. Identify your values, your template for a life of authenticity and personal integrity

Where are you compromising? Commit now to fully living your values.

4. Create a precise vision of your ideal life, one that makes you genuinely happy and fulfilled

Express it tangibly – write out your thoughts, paint a picture, create a collage, design a mood board, whatever is right for you. Feel what it would be like to live that life. Own it.

5. Declutter and nurture

Root out everything that doesn’t belong in that vision, stop tolerating anything that is allowing your life to fall short of your ideal; nurture the golden nuggets, those aspects of your life that are already in harmony with your ideal.