Your Organised Home
Module 6: Your Organised Life

The Story So Far

Please take a moment to answer these questions:

• How did you do with last week’s Actions?
• How are you finding the experience of living a more organised life?
• Did you find a routine yet that works for you to increase the level of order in your life, and which you can apply daily or weekly?

If you can’t quite find the right formula, I would like you to take a new approach to the part of your day or week that you are trying to organise.

Let’s play a game to discover what really goes on behind the scenes when you struggle with daily routines:

“They’re Here!”

Imagine for a moment that aliens from a far off world have landed for a visit.

Friendly fellows, they live on a planet so very different to ours that the basics of housework and domestic life are a complete novelty to them.

As you are a veteran of the clutter wars, the UN has commissioned you to instruct the aliens in ways to create as much chaos and disorder in their daily routine as possible, so that they can fully experience every aspect of life on earth.

Are you ready to accept this mission? Then let’s go!

• Start The Day
  How would our guests start their day if they wanted it to get off on the wrong footing?
  Would they hit the snooze button repeatedly until they’re running late, or perhaps have faulty alarm clock that regularly lets them down?
  Would they make sure that obstacles like creased clothing and dirty mugs are lying in wait in order to cause chaos at the first opportunity?
• Attitudes
  What attitude to life in general would need to be simmering in their pointy little heads in order to create the greatest amount of friction and disharmony?
  Would they need to basically believe that nothing ever goes right for them, or that they were incapable of living like “other people”?
• Staying Stuck
  Which technique would work best to protect the status quo – blaming oneself for every last problem, until the guilt and shame are overriding any last scrap of motivation to change life for the better?
  Or perhaps it would work better to blame someone else in the home, or outside factors, for any problems so that they don’t have to take any action themselves?
• Sweet Dreams
  What would be the last thing our visitors would need to do at night to guarantee the morning comes thudding down on their poor little heads with a vicious crash?
  Dirty washing up is always a terrible sight first thing in the morning, and what else could they arrange the night before to pile on the misery first thing?
  Perhaps they could fall asleep cataloguing everything that went wrong, convincing themselves that life is a vale of tears, and that to struggle every single day with life’s most basic aspects is as normal as breathing.

Sometimes we can begin to create structures in our lives and if they don’t work straight away, or if they feel too new and we run out of motivation to keep them going, it’s easier to slip back into old ways.

By turning this situation around and looking at what you would need to instruct someone who has no concept of how to live chaotically, I am making the point that disorganised living uses as much energy and is just as tedious and uniform as organised living.

Please take a moment to consider where you can apply this knowledge, and if you’ve successfully created some structures from last week’s tips, have a think about any remaining areas of your life where you are encountering resistance and look at the amount of effort you have to put into maintaining that feeling.

Work In Progress

My ongoing commitment to personal development began in the late nineties, when I realised that a lot of things in my life weren’t working for me any more.

The exercise I have given you above, regarding how to teach a visitor to live a disordered life, is based on some fairly standard personal development techniques and I have found it (with or without the little green men) immensely useful for looking at any problem I face in a whole new way.

People, myself included, can tend to get into the habit of keep trying the same actions while expecting different results to magically appear, and for that reason a change of perspective is often useful in showing us a new approach to life’s challenges.

I would like to suggest as the first part of your support structure that you re-read any personal development books you have found useful in the past.

This may sound like a shameless sales pitch but I can honestly say that I read and work through Fiona’s Be Your Own Life Coach about once a year, and I have always found that there are new levels to completing the exercises.

I strongly recommend that book if you haven’t read it and also, while I’m discussing Fiona’s work, I recommend you join up on our conversation board to chat with other like-minded people and have a place to get support for the changes you are making in your life.

All the coaches on Fiona’s team are carefully chosen and expert in their fields, and Francine Kaye’s book Time To Live is for me the essential guide to time management and will help you to apply the basics of this skill to your own organisational endeavours.

Classic Fear Buster

Moving on to other authors, if you’ve not read it yet Susan Jeffer’s Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway is another must-have classic when it comes to understanding that fear is not a reason to stop dead in our tracks, but rather is a sign we are doing something right.

There is, as I’m sure you know, a whole world of motivational books to choose from and while not many of them talk directly about household organisation, the truth behind their teachings can be successfully applied to all areas of your life including the domestic sphere.

A great way to reward yourself for completing this course would be to browse a bookshop or library and select a title or two from their personal development range, and then wholeheartedly commit to working through the exercises in it.

You have proven that you are open to new ways of doing things in your life and you are now in a prime place to take your lifestyle improvements to the next level of excellence.

Textbook Case

Books about housework are plentiful and while I would never trade in my thrillers for a tome about the correct application of surface cleansers, stocking up on one or two basics is a good idea because it will give you something to fall back on.

Clare Coulson’s House Rules is a charming little book packed full of useful information on how to run a stylish and neat home and it’s written in a lovely light style that is very easy to digest.

Because I prefer my housework leavened with a little humour, I also love the How Clean Is Your House? book by Kim Woodburn and Aggie MacKenzie.

It has plenty of useful hints for hardcore cleaning of troublesome areas and while I think the authors are completely potty, it’s huge fun, repays a read and makes a useful textbook.

Finally, to increase your motivation and feed the flames of your love affair with your home, do keep an eye out for any other home decorating and design books that you can use for inspiration as you create your perfect home.

My favourites are the Changing Rooms-style books, and most large modern bookshops will let you browse for hours until you find the one book that you just HAVE to take home because it delights you.

If you have noticed that you like any type of design, or relate strongly to any period of architecture, books about that subject will feed your passion for stylish living and are worth investing time and money in because they will feed your dreams.

Liquid Information

I have already suggested that your search the internet for sites relating to interior décor, and there are many more resources online that cover domestic issues.

Sandra Felton, the US “Organizer Lady” has a web site at www.messies.com and I can wholeheartedly recommend her work even though it is heavily geared to an American audience.

She offers a free daily e-mail service through Yahoo Groups, which can sign up for from her main website above, which mails out invaluable household hints and tips, as well as support for people who have an issue with cluttering.

I have been signed up for it for years now, and with an average of two mails a day going out, it’s particularly worth checking out if you have daily access to e-mail.

www.flylady.net is another US-based website that offers a range of different ideas and motivational tips for staying on top of the housework, and while it’s not a site I love it does have a lot of information and advice.

If you fancy chatting online with real people who have overcome – or are still dealing with – their cluttered lives, a search engine such as www.google.co.uk will find you dozens of online forums where you can discuss all things domestic, from the best way to remove biro stains to creating healthy recipes, learning the basics of menu planning and beyond.

Finding an online group that you feel at home with is a matter of personal taste, so I won’t recommend any, but I suggest you have a look around and see if that kind of support suits you.

The internet offers a wide range of information about every topic under the sun, some of it solid gold and quite a lot of it utter trash.

When you have some spare time on a computer why not search for the areas that you are looking for information on, such as menu planning, redesigning a bedroom, or even learning a new craft such as re-upholstering a chair, or learning the basics of DIY?

Mind, Body, Spirit

So far we have talked about the physical aspects of decluttering, dipped a toe into the psychology of clutter, and the final aspect of household organisation and layout I’m going to mention is the spiritual.

Feng Shui and the Indian art of Vaastu have never been more popular in the west and if approached with an open mind, they offer some common sense insights into the way we relate to our environments and the deep effect that our homes can have on us.

I approached studying Feng Shui with an open mind, and all I will say is that it was not time wasted and that I am inclined to think there may be valid scientific reasons behind the basic rules of placement for important furniture like beds and work spaces.

I began to apply several of the principles in my own life, and while it’s impossible to scientifically “prove” the effects, I did notice some beneficial changes and continue to study and train that subject.

If you have ever wondered about these practices, there are a range of websites that offer information and opinions on them, and my favourite one to date is www.rising-dragon.co.uk which offers a free online tutorial in the basics of Feng Shui.

Real World

Back in the real world, once you have your home running fairly smoothly you are in a great position to start looking for ways to delegate household chores.

Having a cleaner in once a week is a luxury that you might not have considered, but now that your home is sparklingly organised why not see if there is any way you can arrange this?

If you decide to invest in a cleaner, do check references and use shrewd common sense when you choose the person you are allowing into your home, but if you choose wisely you could find that it revolutionises your life.

If you loathe ironing, consider finding someone to step in for a few hours a week and do it for you, and better yet why not be creative and ask people you know to swap some ironing time for a skill you possess?

Many local communities now run Time Banks where participants earn credits for helping each other – one hour of your time entitles you to an hour of someone else’s time.

If that sounds like something you’d like to know more about, you can find your nearest Time Bank at www.timebanks.co.uk

If you belong to any community groups, why not investigate whether they have a similar system or if you feel really motivated, why not set one up yourself?

Nearly all of us possess some unique skill or knowledge that someone else wants access to, so you could turn your life experience to good use and get something you want in exchange for it.

If you have a friend who struggles with domestic tasks, you might find that swapping chores with each other makes getting the housework done a lot more fun.

I don’t know why this is, but I regularly swap time with my best friend who has in the past also battled the clutter monster, and there’s something rewarding about doing someone else’s housework than can be quite lacking when doing your own!

Down To You

Finally, the best source of support and motivation you can possibly have is yourself.

This is why I suggest that you go into the coming weeks with a renewed passion to keep out clutter, and that you invest time and thought into setting up structures and systems that will make it so much easier to be tidy than untidy.

You are the person who has the make-or-break key to organised living in your own head, and it is reasonable and perfectly legitimate for you to spend time and energy perfecting and fine tuining your domestic organisation.

An organised home is a work in progress, just like you and me, and you deserve the very best home you can create for yourself.

Actions of the Week

1. Prepare for the future

What are your feelings about coming to the final week of this course? How can you set yourself up for ongoing success now – will joining an internet forum keep the ball rolling, or do you need to hook up face to face with a coach or perhaps other people in your area who are battling with domestic chores?

If you haven’t done it already, why not upgrade this course to the PLUS version and let me coach you for two hours on the area you most want support with?

You can schedule the coaching to happen at intervals of one month if you suspect that your motivation might need a boost, and I’ll be delighted to work with you one-to-one.

Before the end of this week I would like you to find at least three things you can add to your support system that will work for you, be they books, online resources, scheduled support from me or friends, or social events.

2. Stay alert

Watch out for self-sabotage in future. Stay vigilant for small clutter icebergs waiting to try and sink your ship, and make sure that you implement some techniques to bring some structure into nyour life – the ones I suggested last week are a great starting point and you can work out versions that suit your lifestyle.

Tailor them to your needs, and don’t be afraid to experiment – and do keep on taking this seriously because clutter is a sneaky opponent and given an inch, will take over the whole house.

3. Honour your growth

Investigate further sources of personal development materials that will support you in maintaining a high level of self-esteem, and feed your confidence that you deserve a beautiful home.

Check out the articles on this website and consider taking one of the other online courses that addresses a specific need for you, and make sure that you keep the ball rolling and keep on raising your game.

It is never to late to have your ideal home and it is never to late to make huge improvements in your life – in fact, to quote George Eliot, “It is never too late to be who you might have been.”

You have proven to yourself that you can change your lifestyle so why not spend some time thinking about any other changes you’d like to make, or skills you’d like to acquire, and plan an exciting program of study of personal development in order to stay fresh and excited about your life, and your potential?

4. Capture the moment

Consider taking some photos of your home when it’s at its absolute best, because very often a photo shows us our home as other people see it. Initially taking photos of your home at its neatest will inspire you and give you a benchmark against which to compare things a week, or a month, further down the line.

As you move into your organised and stylish future, your snapshots of this early stage will be a good reference point and they will also help you to spot any areas where you’d like a change of these or need to make some alterations to the layout.

I regularly photograph my own home and I regard it as an invaluable way to get a different perspective on things.

5. Well Done!

Right now congratulate yourself on creating the clutter-free home that is your foundation for a wonderful life.

Sadly, some people never get past dreaming that things will improve someday and you have shown yourself to be in theat group of people who can make a plan and carry it off.

Share the congratulations with anyone you live with who has helped and supported you, and ensure everyone undertands the benefits of continuing to move your home forards into harmony and order.

Give yourself respect where it is due and make this week the week you celebrate the start of your new organised lifestyle!

Thank you for working through this course right to week 6 – this is of course not the end of your journey to your ideal home, but it is the end of our weekly sessions.